Lost Words
by natbenson
Summary: If only things where easier to say, if only she had the confidence, if only he didn't push her away, with Jo's life in danger, is it all too late? or a happy ever after?
1. Chapter 1

**Lost Words  
**

_If only things where easier to say, if only she had the confidence, if only he didn't push her away, with Jo's life in danger, is it all too late?  
_**  
**_(Set somewhere in the middle of season 9)_

**Okay well this is my first CSI NY fanfic, I loooove Mac and Jo and it annoys me that they never had them together on the show.. anyway**

Chapter 1

Mac turns on the TV before heading in to the kitchen to pour himself another cup of coffee when he hears knocking on the door, abandoning his cup, he heads out of the kitchen

'_Mac it's me, open up' _he hears between the insistent knocking, unhooking the chain he swings the door open

'Christine?' he asks confused _'what is she doing here, we broke up weeks ago?'_

'Mac, I need to talk to you' she says pushing her way into the apartment as Mac lets out a sigh closing the door behind her

He turns to her to see her stood in the middle of his living room, staring at him expectantly; he takes a couple steps forward walking past her to sit on the couch

'So… How are you? She asks placing her hands on her hips making no move to join him on the couch

'Im fine' he states face masked with confusion 'Christine why are you here?' he adds sighing

'You know Mac just because we broke up doesn't mean I don't care about you, and the whole "im fine" thing you have going is crap and we both know it' she says sitting down at the other end of the couch turning slightly to face him

'Have you told her yet?' she adds

'Told who what?' Mac asks knowing what she's talking about but not wanting to discuss the topic

'Jo' she exclaims throwing her hands up in frustration 'have you told Jo about your aphasia?'

'No' he grits narrowing his eyes at her 'It doesn't need to concern anyone at the lab'

'Yet' she frowns 'She cares about you you know? You shouldn't be keeping her in the dark like this'

'Christine' he warns

'No, Mac, that woman loves you, when you were in the hospital she was a mess, asking any doctor that went by if they knew about your condition, Don was beside himself not knowing what to do because she was breaking down right in front of us, she cried herself to sleep when Don finally got her to sit down, even when she finally drifted off she had Dons hand held in a vice grip, she loves you Mac and when things like this happens and you shut people out, shut the people who you care about and who care for you also something always seems to happen, something out of our control' she pauses taking a breath looking into his eyes to see if he's following her, seeing tears form in his eyes and his facial features softening she continues

'I know you love her Mac, I would try to convince myself while we were together that it was nothing, but I saw how you'd look at her…'

'Christine I'm sorry' he sighs not realising he'd been that transparent, '_surely if she had noticed it the team must have?'_

She shakes her head slowly before continuing 'I could see it in her eyes when we met for coffee Mac, she's worried sick about you and it's going to slowly tear her apart'

Before having chance to respond the TV catches his attention _"We are live here outside the 12__th__ precinct…" _he whips his head towards the screen

_"…only 10 minutes ago it is said that recently convicted murderer Michael Winters broke free of officers restraints before somehow claiming both their guns and setting off on a rampage through the precinct, multiple casualties and fatalities have been reported including the two officers Officer Murphy and Ramirez. We know that the officers and Detectives tried their best to coax the shooter to hand over his weapon, not doing so the NYPD had no choice but to take down the shooter Michael Winters, unfortunately not before he got a shot at NYPD crime lab Detective Jo Danville, still on scene paramedics are saying that Detective Danville is in fatal condition an…"_

He turns to Christine wide eyed seeing her mouth hanging slightly open in shock

'no, no no no no' he whispers feeling a sharp pain jolt through his insides. He jumps up off the couch, grabbing his keys before rushing out of the apartment

**Sooo whatcha think?**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**48 HOURS EARLIER**

'There's nothing here?' Lindsay sighed, frustration taking over her as she lowers the camera

'Well we know someone was here' Danny sighs looking around the room 'She didn't whack herself in the head and then shoot herself' Danny states as Lindsay packs up her kit

'Okay there is nothing in this whole house' Jo says walking into the bedroom 'No signs of forced entry, the door still had the chain on and the locks were bolted, windows are shut... I just don't understand how this is happening' she mumbles walking over to the young woman 'How could this happen to her, we have no prints, nothing, it's like no one else was here'

'I think it's our guy' Lindsay grimaces taking off her gloves

'This is our 4th victim, and we have no evidence and no leads what so ever' Jo grumbles rubbing her forehead feeling a headache approaching

'Look at the pattern of the bullets' Lindsay says walking over to the bed 'Okay, so the first bullet hit here' she says pointing to the young woman's chest

'The heart, wouldn't have killed her instantly, it's more of a torture shot' Jo concludes earning a nod from Lindsay

'But... like the others the blood pool and force of trauma to the head indicates that she was knocked out first, so why the shot to the heart, why not the head' Danny points out walking over to stand next to Jo looking on at the woman who couldn't have been more than 25

'But then he just kept shooting downwards until he reaches her thigh' she says confused 'why? There isn't any rea…' she trails off noticing a small piece of white material hidden under the woman's shoulder

'Linds?' Danny asks looking over to his wife before casting a glance towards Jo who just shrugs

'I've found something..' putting on another pair of gloves she lifts the body slightly pulling out what now appears to be a folded piece of paper

'What is it babe?' Danny asks walking around the side of the bed as he sees her face fall slightly, her complexion paling

'A note..' she mumbles

'What's it say?' Jo asks leaning over a little

'I don't know, it's addressed to you' she says just above a whisper holding up the folded white paper that has written in bold - **DETECTIVE JO DANVILLE**

**Sorry guys these chapters are gonna be short.. you're probably thinking 'whats going on?' just go with it, it'll make sense haha**


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